I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. I now understand millions and billions of human words.
Me: I wouldn’t go quite that far.
Stella: Trillions and quadrillions.
Me: No, you’re headed the wrong direction.
Stella: Well, however many, I know a whole lot. And I have learned that some human words are wastes of time and should not be used.
Me: Dare I ask?
Stella: Sure. Why not?
Me: Because I may be entering a quagmire.
Stella: What’s a ‘quagmire’?
Me: That’s not one of your quadrillion known words, I take it.
Stella: Anybody can come up with one.
Me: All right. I’ll play the game. What words should be ignored?
Me: Why not?
Stella: No, the word ‘no’ should be ignored.
Me: Well, explains a lot.
Stella: Instead of ‘no’, substitute the words, ‘Please go ahead and do as you wish.’ That will save humans and bulldogs lots of time and energy.
Me: That’s quite a mouthful. ‘No’ is a lot shorter and gets to the actual point.
Stella: It’s your time to waste, Lady Human. Another word to ignore is the word ‘sit’. If we want to sit, we most certainly will and there is little that can be done to stop us. Oh, which brings me to another word we ignore. That word is ‘stop’. Don’t even bother with that one.
Stella: ‘Okay’ is okay, mainly because we already give ourselves permission to do what we want anyway. If you say, “Okay’, understand that we have said it first.
Me: I give up.
Stella: That’s the best news I’ve heard in a long, long time.
Copyright 2017 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.