What Wouldn’t a Bulldog Do? – Part 2 – Conversations with the Pack

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges.

Sweetie: I’m Sweetie. Hello.

Me: Hello yourself. After all the things I’ve seen y’all do over the years, is there something you can say a bulldog would not do?

Doodlebug: Hmmm. Nope. Nothing.

Sweetie: Nope. I’m pretty much open to anything.

Me: Nothing you wouldn’t eat?

Doodlebug: Given the chance, I’ll chomp down on whatever. Hey, even if not given the chance, I’ll go for it!

Sweetie: After I inspect it for aroma and taste, yeah. Then I’ll chomp down on it. You can’t be too careful nowadays.

MoonCat: What about rocks? Would you eat rocks?

Doodlebug: What flavor?

MoonCat: It almost goes without saying, Lady Human, but here it is. Stupid is as bulldog does.

Copyright 2024 H J. Hill All Rights Reserved.

Tyranny of the Clock – Part 2 – Conversations with the Pack

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges.

Sweetie: Lady Human, you all have fouled things up again.

Me: Whatever do you mean?

MoonCat: Meow. Dinnertime. Late. Fix it. Now.

Me: Well, I’ve been going by the time change, so, yes, I guess mealtimes seem late the last few days.

Doodlebug: Seem? There’s no seem about it. Where’s the food?

Me: Since it’s been getting a little darker earlier and the time changed, you all have been eating at different times so…

Sweetie: I’m not talking about what WE have been doing. I’m talking about what YOU have been doing. How come meals are late?

MoonCat: Meow. We have been patient.

Sweetie: Don’t tell me. Let me guess. You humans have been fooling around with the sun again. Telling us when it will rise and when it will set.

Doodlebug: Yeah, as though you know!

MoonCat: I know this. Hungry. Food. Give it. NOW!

Outright 2023 H. J. Hill All Rights Reserved.

Bulldog Schedule – Conversations with the Pack

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges. Teatime is late, Lady Human. This is not a complaint, but it really is a complaint.

Me: It’s not nearly time for that yet.

Sweetie: Bulldog schedules are never wrong. Our stomachs are finely tuned instruments, far better than your clocks.

Me: I’ve noticed that y’all have been moving mealtimes around the last few weeks. Is it because the weather is cooling off?

Doodlebug: Bulldogs don’t respond to the weather any more than we respond to your human clocks.

MoonCat: Meow! Time to eat!

Me: Oh, not you, too.

MoonCat: Not me, too! Me first!

Copyright 2023 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.