I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. Spring has returned, and the days have been lovely and cool…
Tiger: Halt! Stop! Enough! Too much!
Stella: How dare you interrupt your queen!
Tiger: Queen nothin’! Who do you think you are?
Stella: I think that I am the Queen. I think that I am Stella.
Tiger: So, I came in from outside and I was all playful and prancing and I greeted you and what did you do?
Stella: Nothing important.
Tiger: You puffed out your cheeks at me and then you called me, “Miss Priss” and said I was prissing around, whatever that means. So rude! And all I was doing was being friendly.
Me: And Tiger, you locked eyes with her. And Stella, you locked eyes with Tiger. And friendly came to an abrupt stop.
Stella: Yeah, Miss Priss. As queen, I decree that Tiger’s name is no longer Tiger, but she shall henceforth be known as ‘Miss Priss’.
Tiger: There she goes again, Lady Human! My name is Tiger. Stop trying to change everybody’s name!
Stella: If the prissy name fits, wear it.
Copyright 2018 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.
I am Stella. I am an Olde English Bulldogge. I am their Queen.
Me: Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!
Stella: And I am not stupid.
Me: No! Me! Me! Me!
Stella: Apparently, Lady Human has done or said something that now displeases her, that she now considers to be a mistake. I only have a bulldog’s brain, but I understand this every time she yells at herself.
Me: Dumb! Dumb! Dumb!
Stella: Why are you scolding yourself, Lady Human?
Me: Oh, you wouldn’t understand.
Stella: So now you are calling me stupid?
Me: No. Just stupid ole me.
Stella: Now hear this!
Me: Ow! That hurt my ears!
Stella: I have to be loud to get you to hear me! Don’t call yourself ‘stupid’! You listen to your own voice more than to any other. You are not stupid. A stupid person would not love bulldogs. A stupid human would not feed us and water us and play with us and talk to us. When you lie to yourself, calling yourself that word, you start to believe it and that is bad for you. And I love you and I don’t want anything bad for you. So SHUT UP!
Me: Stella, that was rude! And kind. Thank you.
Stella: Don’t mention it.
Me: I appreciate…
Stella: No, I mean it. Don’t mention it. SHUT UP. STOP TALKING. NAP TIME.
Copyright 2017 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.