Battle Stations! – Conversations with the Pack

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges. Whoa! What was that?

Sweetie: I’m on it! Check in there! I’m checking Lady Human’s room!

Doodlebug: Nothing! What about outside?

Me: I just checked the front porch. All still and quiet out there.

Doodlebug: Wow! Lady Human! You’ve got a big metal stick in your hand! Cool!

Sweetie: I could stand to have a whole army of bulldogs right now.

Me: I don’t think we could manage even a platoon of bulldogs, much less a whole army.

MoonCat: It pays to be prepared. Where is that rooster and his chicken army when you need them?

©️ 2026. H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

Who Your Advisers Are Says a Lot about You – Conversations with Stella

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I, Stella, Illustrious Queen of the Illustrious Olde English Bulldogges, hereby announce my appointments for my personal cabinet.

Me:        Why?

Stella:    The humans are doing it. The humans are not better than I am. If they get to have advisers, so do I.

Me:        What if these advisers recommend something you disapprove?

Stella:    Then they’re fired! Boom! There! I said it! You heard me!

Me:        Okay. Who are you appointing?

Stella:    First of all, Snoopey will be Secretary of Defense and Chief of Bulldog Security.

Me:        Why Snoopey?

Stella:    She is First Barker. Whenever there is a strange noise or unknown threat, whether it exists or not, she is on her feet, barking her head off. To be honest, Snoopey is our pack leader. That is hard for me to admit, but if the pack needs to be defended, Snoopey is the one who will do the job. Not me.

Me:        But you are the Queen. I have seen you hold your own against all the bulldogs.

Stella:    I can make my point clear. I am a peacemaker. But Snoopey cares for all the bulldogs, even the ones who challenge her. She would sacrifice herself to save others.

Me:        Very well. That sounds reasonable. Who’s next?

Stella:    Tiger will be Assistant Secretary of Defense.

Me:        Why?

Stella:    When she was attacked by that dog in her old place, she learned what it meant to fight, to defend, and to lose. She almost died.

Me:        I know. We experienced her battle to recover but not her first battle.

Stella:   She told me about it. She said that she learned defense is as important as offense. She wishes that she had known that from the beginning.

Me:        Still she has picked fights with Snoopey.

Stella:    It is hard for a warrior to sit on the sidelines.

Me:        I understand. Who is next?

Stella:    Wiggles. Ah, poor Wiggles. Sweetest dog ever.

Me:        I know that you don’t like it when we say that. But you must admit she is sweet.

Stella:    Well, she is a good dancer. I can appoint her Secretary of the Arts.

Me:        She can dance and make everybody feel more relaxed, calmer.

Stella:    I can also appoint her Secretary of Eggs. The hens push eggs toward her when she paws at them.

Me:        Yes, she does have a way with the chickens.

Stella:    Finding the right dog for the right job. I do not envy the humans.

Me:        That leaves Doodlebug and Miss Sweetie.

Stella:    Those sillies! I have the perfect jobs for them. They can be president and vice president. I don’t even know what those jobs are so they can’t be too important.

Me:        Which one will be president?

Stella:    Which one weighs more?

 

 

Copyright 2016 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.