Bulldog News Network – Conversations with Stella

I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges, and this is BNN – Bulldog News Network, blah, blah, blah, all talk all the time, just like the boring humans…

Me:        Stella, what brought this on?

Stella:    Today there was a sale on cheese at the human food place and Lady Human bought it all and brought it home just for herself. She owns all the cheese in the world.

Me:        How would that even be possible?

Stella:    Snoopey is here with us now for an interview to tell what she witnessed.

Snoopey: What is an interview?

Stella:    What did you see when Lady Human opened the door to the Big Cold Box?

Snoopey:  Lots and lots of wonderful food.

Stella:    That proves it.

Me:        It doesn’t prove that I own all the cheese in the world or even all the cheese from a store.

Stella:    Now we welcome Tiger who has more to add to this story.

Me:        What story? I bought a little bit of cheese.

Stella:    Tiger, what do you have to say to Lady Human’s denial of cheese hoarding?

Tiger:     Hello.

Stella:    Can you be more specific?

Tiger:     Hello, people.

Stella:    Wiggles, Doodlebug, Sweetie, what can you add?

(background snoring and odd snorting noises)

Me:        Are they your audience because…

Stella:    Am I the only one concerned about the level of cheese hoarding here?

Me:        Apparently.

Snoopey:  I guess so.

Tiger:     Yes.

Stella:    Well, I can’t keep commenting on nothing.

Me:        Nope.

Snoopey:  That’s right.

Tiger:     So shut up.

Stella:    Tomorrow on BNN – Bulldog News Network, I will interview Lady Human about how she has slowly but drastically reduced the size of treats during the past month.

Me:        Uh, I may arrange to be unavailable for that.

Snoopey:  Smaller treats? What? Really?

Tiger:     As long as I get mine and Snoopey’s, too, I don’t care.



Copyright 2017 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.

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