Stare Down – Conversations with Stella and Moon the Cat

I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. I can’t talk now.

Me:        Then why did you introduce yourself?

Stella:    I can’t talk because I am in a stare down with Moon the Cat. It is intense. It is touch and go. But in the end, I am sure that my huge bulldog eyes will win.

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Me:        What do you say to that, Moon?

Moon the Cat:   Meow.

Stella:    Typical.

Me:        This is quite a contest. What are the rules?

Stella:    Ask her.

Moon the Cat:   Meooowww.

Stella:    Must I explain everything? Oh, all right. We stare each other in the eyes. No looking away.

Me:        Is blinking allowed?

Stella:    Of course. What do you think we are? Crazy?

Me:        I haven’t figured that out yet.

Stella:    Whoever looks away, moves away, or falls asleep first, loses!

Me:        Falling asleep is an option?

Stella:    The game can grow boring after a while.

Me:        What if someone interferes?

Stella:    Then we stare at them. Since they can’t stare in two directions at once, they lose.

Me:        This is just for you two, I take it.

Stella:    She is my nemesis and I am hers.

Me:        Okey dokey then. Well, see y’all later.

Stella:    Only if the stare down is still going and you want to play. Remember the rules. You lose.

 

 

Copyright 2017 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.

 

 

 

 

 

Do You Hear What I Hear? – Conversations with Stella

Stella:    Help! Weirdnesses have grown over Lady Human’s ears! Her ears are swollen so big. The weird things are consuming her head! If any humans can hear me, please help!

Me:        It’s all right, Stella! These are headphones, not weirdnesses, whatever those are. They help me hear when everything conspires against me. Namely, barking bulldogs.

Stella:    Why were you wearing them? They are not attractive. That is not an insult. That is a fact.

Me:        Thank you for your bulldog bluntness. I was listening to a seminar by Michael Hyatt about productivity and focus. Despite his suggestions, my productivity and focus were sorely disrupted by the barking of a pack of bulldogs.

Stella:    Your headphones did not protect you from our barking? We are more powerful than I thought we were. Excellent!

Me:        No, not excellent. Loud and distracting! What was the barking about?

Stella:    I don’t know. No one was speaking clearly. It sounded to me like Ruff! Ruff! Food! Ruff! Treats! Ruff! Ruff! Fun! You know. The usual stuff.

Me:        Sadly, I don’t know. I’ll have to take your word for it.

Stella:    I would not lie to you, Lady Human, not on purpose anyway.

Me:        When you see my headphones on my head, can you all try to keep the noise to a minimum.

Stella:    We will try. Now just how loud is a minimum?

 

 

Copyright 2016 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.