Bulldog Treat Catch Bowl Game – Conversations with Stella

I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. Welcome to the Bulldog Treat Catching Bowl Game. Today’s contestants are Tiger and Doodlebug.

Me:        Okay, ready, Doodle?

Doodlebug:   Mmm hmmm.

Stella:    Whoops! Miss!

Doodlebug:   Not fair! Do over!

Stella:    Let Tiger have her turn.

Me:   Okay, ready, Tiger?

Tiger:   Yep.

Stella:    Nice catch. One point.

Doodlebug:   How does she do that?

Tiger:   Watch and learn, kid.

Me:   Tiger keeps her eyes on the treat and keeps her mouth slightly open. As it falls, if she has to, she adjusts her head to get right under it. Great technique.

Doodlebug:   What am I doing wrong?

Stella:   Simple. You keep your mouth shut and look up like you expect the treat to fall right into it anyway and, when it doesn’t, you look all surprised. It bounces off your nose and you’re all like, “How did that happen?”

Doodlebug:   Well, how does that happen?

Stella:    Doodle! Closed mouths catch no treats.

Tiger:   Neither does his opened mouth. Pick a new game, bud. Maybe something where you use your big ole paws to bat treats into my mouth.

 

 

 

Copyright 2017 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.

Joining In Bulldog Games – Conversations with Stella

I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. I am the scorekeeper for the bulldog

games. What are they? I have no idea. When are they? Whenever. At Christmas time, the humans sing a song about reindeer games. If I don’t know what bulldog games are and I am a bulldog, I sure don’t know what reindeer games are. It is all too confusing and tiring. I am going to take a nap. At least I know what that is.

Me:        I just started a treat catch game with Doodlebug and Tiger. Do you want to try it? All I do is hold a treat up above each of their heads and I drop it. They try to catch it in their mouths. Tiger is really good at it. She’s running about 90% accuracy.

Stella:    And Doodlebug? He has the biggest face and biggest mouth of us all. How is he doing?

Me:        Well, he moves his head a lot and the treat bounces off his nose most of the time. So…

Stella:    He’s a loser.

Me:        No, I wouldn’t say that.

Stella:    I would. He can’t catch a treat in his big ole mouth because he won’t stop moving.

Me:        Treat catch is just not his particular game. Every once in a while, he gets one. So…

Stella:    He’s a part-time loser.

Me:        And a part-time winner.

Stella:    Pffffttt!

Me:        Stella! How rude!

Stella:    Let me try that treat catch game.

Me:        All right. Here goes!

Stella:    Awww! It bounced off my nose. Here, let me eat it.

Me:        Want to try again? 1…2…3…

Stella:    Aaagggh! It bounced off my nose. Where did it go?

Me:        Never mind. I’ll find it later.

Stella:    Never mind ‘never mind’. I’ll find it later!

Me:        One more try, okay?

Stella:    I CAUGHT IT! Right in my mouth! Yay, me!!! Aacckk! Aacckk! Aaaaghh!

Me:        Chew it slowly.

Stella:    What kind of a stupid game is this? The Choke a Bulldog by Throwing Food Game?

Me:        No, that’s why the pieces are small. You just have to chew what you catch.

Stella:    Oh, I’m sorry. I thought the treats were small because you were being stingy.

 

 

 

 

Copyright 2017 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.