I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges.
Sweetie: We have an idea, Lady Human.
Me: Uh-oh.
Doodlebug: It’s a great idea. You can punch a big bulldog-sized hole in the wall so that we can go out and come in all night long and you won’t even know.
Me: And so can all the other local roaming visitors like possums and skunks and rats and snakes…
Sweetie: Whoa whoa whoa!
Me: …and raccoons and coyotes and…
Doodlebug: Very well then. Nevermind. We were just trying to help.
MoonCat: Occasionally, the humans do have a good idea.
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Bulldoggy 