I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. Lady Human is washing big pieces of cloth in her big, noisy machine. It is annoying. I wish it would stop. Dare I ask?
Me: Nope.
Stella: Please.
Me: Nope. Has to be done.
Stella: But why? It just goes on and on and on and on…
Me: I have to wash all this stuff to get the dog smell out.
Stella: Dog smell? Like what I smell or what I smell like?
Me: What you all smell like.
Stella: Are you saying that I stink? Are you saying that you don’t like the way I smell? Awwww. My smell is me. If you don’t like my smell, you don’t like me. Awwwww.
Me: Not the same.
Stella: Yes, the same. How can I separate me from what I smell like?
Me: I could give you a few more baths.
Stella: Some other way.
Me: I can do what I’m doing right now. Wash everything. Now that you and Snoopey are both sleeping in my room, I have to wash your bedding…and mine pretty often. When I walk into my room, I want it smell more like me than like you.
Stella: Wrong choice.
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Bulldoggy 