I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. Early this morning, I was minding my business as usual when the still air was wrecked by the most awful noise. BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!
Me: I know. Everyone woke up.
Stella: BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!
Me: Thank you, Stella. I heard.
Stella: What a ridiculous noise! I know it was a human noise. Do you know how I know? No self-respecting animal would make a noise like that.
Me: A goose would. More of a honk, but still…
Stella: That annoying bird that was in that movie on the Picture Box. No, thank you! But you have to admit, the beeping is worse.
Me: Well, when everybody jumped up and started barking like mad…no, I don’t see the difference. You all did that at the goose during my movie. I always have to watch that movie more than once just to hear what’s going on because of all the barking at the goose.
Stella: Maybe you should stop watching that movie. That would solve everything.
Me: I don’t agree that bulldogs should dictate my television viewing habits.
Stella: Well, someone needs to. So, all that beeping this morning AND YESTERDAY had nothing to do with gooses.
Me: Two “gooses” are referred to as geese.
Stella: Lady Human, your language makes me want to scream.
Me: Please don’t. We’ve already had enough noise around here today.
Stella: Who was beeping and how do we get it to stop?
Me: Today it was a bulk trash truck. It came earlier than usual. Yesterday it was the regular trash truck. I guess they had to back up.
Stella: Why does backing up beep?
Me: It’s a warning that they put on big trucks. It lets everybody around know that the truck is backing up and may be blind to what’s behind it.
Me: Not for you all. Stay away from the trucks…and you do…and there is no danger.
Stella: Except to our ears. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. Humans and their noises. Honestly. Where does it end?
Copyright 2017 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.