Eat, Eat, And Eat Again! – Conversations with Stella

I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges, Illustrious, Noble, and slightly ticked off. I eat once a day (not counting treats), sometimes twice a day if I don’t feel like finishing my breakfast all at one time. But Lady Human is another matter. She eats umpteen gillion times a day (yes, that is a number – a bulldog number) and she never offers me any.

Me:        You eat exactly as much as is recommended for you. If I start giving you my food, there will be no end.

Stella:    Of course not, because you never stop eating.

Me:        Nonsense.

Stella:    How many times a day do you eat?

Me:        I refuse to be judged by a bulldog. Especially not by a bulldog with your fascination over food.

Stella:    How many? How many? How many?

Me:        Oh, all right. Stop hopping up and down. Well, there is breakfast.

Stella:    And then?

Me:        Second breakfast?

Stella:    Like those cute Hobbits in that long, long movie with all the ugly orcs and that Ring that everybody just had to have. I understand. Sometimes one breakfast is simply not enough.

Me:        Then lunch. And then a light snack, usually fruit. And after that, a high protein snack. And finally, supper.

Stella:    Lady Human, for shame!

Me:        I break my food consumption up into 6 small meals a day instead of 3 larger ones. It works well for me.

Stella:    And what do you call your meal of cookies, brownies, cake, and candy?

Me:        I don’t make a meal of that.

Stella:    Uh-huh.

Me:        I mean I may have some of that stuff once in a while, but it’s not a meal.

Stella:    Uh-huh.

Me:        It’s not!

Stella:    Share with me when you decide to eat it next time.

Me:        I can’t. It’s not healthy…

Stella:    Ummm! Caught!

Me:        Hey, there’s a lot of stuff that is healthy for me, that I can eat but you can’t – avocados, grapes, raisins, garlic, onions, chocolate…

Stella:    Cookies, brownies, cake, candy.

Me:        Why is it important to you what I eat?

Stella:    I care.

Me:        Stella, I’m touched. That is so sweet. You care.

Stella:    Of course, I care. I will always care. Food. It’s what’s for supper.

 

 

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