An Easter Norther Stole Our Spring – Conversations with Stella and the Pack

I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. Yesterday it was what the humans call Spring. Today it is what I call freaking cold. Spring ran away. I guess it is afraid of the cold wind.

Me:        Yesterday the temperature was in the 80’s. Today it’s been in the 30’s. Welcome to Texas.

Miss Sweetie:    Why, Lady Human, why? The sky is blank. I can’t have a sunbath without a sun.

Me:        The Easter Norther was a week late this year.

Stella:    Easter Norther? Is that yet another horrible human invention? Are crazy people running things?

Me:        Nope. No human is in charge of the Easter Norther. Even after Spring has sprung, we usually get one last cold front right before Easter. I guess this one took the long way around.

Tiger:     My toes are cold. They were warm and now they are cold. This is a mysterious mystery. Who stole our Spring? And what is Spring anyway? And do we want it back? And how do we get it back if we do? These are questions that need answers.

Wiggles:   Please turn off the fans!

Me:        All the fans are off.

Wiggles:   Not the ones outside. They are blowing like the cold boxes in summer.

Me:        That’s the North Wind.

Doodlebug:        Well, Miss Easter Norther North Wind can keep her little jokes to herself from now on. Where is she anyway? I want to have a few words with her.

Me:        An Easter Norther can’t have a conversation. It is a weather front. It has no mouth.

Stella:    Of course, it does. It’s been spitting in my face all day long.

 

 

Copyright 2018 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Where Did My Hair Get Off To? – Conversations with Stella and Wiggles

I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. Lady Human, you need to give Wiggles some of your clothes.

Me:        Why?

Stella:    She is running around naked.

Me:        Technically, so are you. So are all of you.

Stella:    Nonsense. I am covered with hair. I am never naked. That is my natural state. But just look at Wiggles. She is naked on both sides.

Me:        Yeah, she’s blown her coat again. That happens about once a year with her. A good number of dogs blow their coats going from winter into spring. Her coat is a lot thinner than yours so when she loses hair, her skin shows through.

Wiggles:   Where did my hair get off to?

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Me:        Check the ground.

Wiggles:   Please sweep it up and stick it back on, Lady Human. Stella keeps calling me naked like that’s something bad. Is that bad?

Me:        Well, you’re only missing some hair on your sides. It’s growing back in.

Wiggles:   My sides do feel a little breezy when the wind blows. Maybe I should go naked all the time, especially in the hot season.

Stella:    NOOOO!!! Nobody wants to see that! Cover it up! Cover it up! Somebody, find my sweater!

 

 

 

 

Copyright 2018 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.

Ice Bath – Conversations with Stella and Miss Sweetie

I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. Miss Sweetie is a beloved member of our pack. She is an idiot.

Miss Sweetie:    I love you, too, Aunt Stella.

Me:        Sweetie is not an idiot. She’s a little…quirky…sometimes. And at other times, she is scary smart.

Stella:    Would that be when she sits in the puppy pool full of rainwater on a morning when the temperature was…what was the temperature this morning, Lady Human?

Me:        48 degrees Fahrenheit.

Stella:    48 degrees fah…blah…blah…whatever that means. Bottom line, it was a trifle cool this morning to go for a swim.

Me:        It was chilly, Sweetie. I was surprised to see you try it.

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Miss Sweetie:    The trees are green. The birds are singing. The sky is clear. Aunt Stella says that means winter is over. That means SWIMMING WEATHER!

Me:        Swimming weather may take a while longer to arrive. Didn’t you find the water in the puppy pool a little too cold for comfort?

Miss Sweetie:    Now that you mention it, I sat down in it and it was not comfortable, so I stood up and then my feetsies got cold, so I stepped out of it.

Stella:    In short, it was too cold to get in the puppy pool which all the rest of us seemed to know.

Me:        I have dumped out the rainwater, so it won’t be a temptation.

Miss Sweetie:    No! How will I swim?

Stella:    Sweetie, you can’t swim in the puppy pool.  It’s not swimming weather yet.

Miss Sweetie:   They are my feetsies. If I want to ice my own toes, my business.

Stella:    Do you see, Lady Human? Now you understand what we are dealing with.

 

 

 

 

 

Copyright 2018 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.