I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. Everyone be quiet. Something is wrong with Lady Human and I don’t know what it is.
Snoopey: She is not moving.
Tiger: She is breathing.
Wiggles: Her eyes are closed. Does that mean that she is dead?
Stella: I don’t know. I’ve never seen anything like this before. She is warm.
Snoopey: But not too warm. She is cool, too. She smells alive.
Doodlebug: I need to pee. Can she open the door to the outside world?
Stella: Hush, Doodle. No, she can’t, not right now.
Doodlebug: But I need to pee.
Snoopey: Should we paw her? I’ve done that at night in the dark and all she does is turn over.
Stella: You’ve seen her eyes closed like this before?
Snoopey: Sure, but only in the dark. Why are her eyes closed in the daylight? Why are her eyes closed in here?
Miss Sweetie: Maybe she needs to pee. Ask her.
Doodlebug: Yeah, because I need to pee.
Stella: I will touch her with my paw. Maybe she will move. Everyone, stand back.
Me: Hmmm. What? What’s going on? Why are you all staring at me like that?
Stella: Rah rahr?
Me: I beg your pardon.
Stella: That is bulldoggese for ‘Are you alive?’ Well, are you?
Me: Yeah, sure. I guess I just dozed off.
Stella: Dozed off? Does that mean you died?
Me: No, of course not. I fell asleep. Like you all do when you take a nap.
Stella: Is that what a nap looks like from the outside? Horrifying! We never do anything like that!
Me: You’ve seen me do it before. Snoopey, you’ve seen me asleep every night for months now.
Snoopey: Yep, but it looks a lot different in the dark.
Stella: Lady Human, don’t ever do that again!
Wiggles: So she is alive?
Stella: Yes, Wiggles, duh.
Miss Sweetie: She doesn’t look very alive to me.
Copyright 2017 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.