I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. THIS IS AN URGENT UPDATE ALERT. Lady Human’s efforts to make an indestructible bulldog toy have FAILED! What a terrible disaster!
Me: Not terrible, not a disaster, and not failed. I haven’t given up yet. Here is our current progress toward the indestructible bulldog stuffie toy.
Stella: That looks horrible! Why did you put holes in it when you made it?
Me: I didn’t. She tore those after only 15 minutes of constant bulldog attention.
Stella: Please put the poor stuffed toy out of its misery.
Me: Actually, I am going to cut a shell a little larger but in the same shape to add an extra layer. That will make 3 layers of fabric with the same amount of stuffing. She has not yet busted a seam, just torn the material. Of course, she only had it for a few minutes.
Stella: Putting an extra layer on will make it bigger?
Me: Yes, a little.
Stella: And if she tears a hole in that?
Me: I may try a fourth layer.
Stella: And then another. And another. And so, it keeps growing larger and larger and larger. And suddenly, there will be no room in the house. The stuffie toy will take over and we will have to move into the yard!
Me: Stella.
Stella: And Sweetie won’t be able to fit it into her mouth, so she will start chewing up other things. Like the fence, and then all the animals of the creek will come running in and squirrels…SQUIRRELS OVERRUNNING US!
Me: Stella! Stop! Your overactive imagination is what’s overrunning us. We have talked about this before. Calm down.
Stella: Calm? How can I be calm when you are creating stuffed animals that will take over the world?
Me: I can tell that it’s going to be a long week.
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Bulldoggy 