Stella: Whatcha doin’?
Me: Hello, Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges.
Stella: Don’t change the subject. Whatcha doin’?
Stella: All right. I asked politely. I am a dog, but I am not stupid. It is obvious that you are doing something. You have cloth on your lap and it is not clothing, or a blanket, or a napkin. So now I am demanding an answer as your queen…
Me: MY Queen?
Stella: What are you doing?
Me: I am attempting the impossible. I bought material today to put together an indestructible bulldog toy to replace Miss Sweetie’s stuffed chicken…Stella? Stella?
Stella: Hahahahahaha! Wait…I am catching my breath…Hahahahahahahahaha!
Me: Don’t you see that it would be better for her to have a soft toy she will like but will not be able to pull apart and swallow?
Stella: Yes. Hahahahahahahaha! Indestructible and bulldog never fit in the same sentence. How many years do you plan on devoting to this impossible task?
Me: Not years. A few days, off and on when I have time.
Stella: Days? Hahahahahahahahahahaha!
Me: Well, thank you for your support.
Stella: You are welcome. I have all kinds of plans for how you should spend your time. First, buy me treats.
Me: You have treats.
Stella: I need more. Second, feed me my treats.
Me: Takes a couple of seconds, that’s it.
Stella: Third, scratch me and massage my shoulders until I say ‘stop’.
Me: Which is one word that you will never say, so pretty much the rest of our lives.
Stella: What’s the problem? It’s more fun than sewing some toy for Sweetie that she is going to destroy in a few minutes, isn’t it?
Me: Mmmm. I’m going to have to think about that. Still, I bought all this fabric…
Stella: I’ve been wanting a hoodie for cold weather camping.
Me: Mmmm. 5 months or so. That might just about give me enough time. But Sweetie is without her toy. I feel sorry for her.
Stella: Never feel sorry for a spoiled bulldog. They will control you forever. Now, scratch my belly!
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