I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. Relaxing, chilling, getting a massage on Lady Human’s bed, calm and collected. I could do this all day every day. Hey! What was that?
Me: What?
Stella: No, I said what. Never mind. This is my favorite time of day, unless, of course, it is bedtime when I get almost all the back scratching I want. Almost. Hey, what was that?
Me: What?
Stella: Why do you keep asking the same question I am? Are you playing a weird game?
Me: Umm…
Stella: Wait! Why are you scratching my belly with just one hand? Where is your other hand? My care and maintenance require two hands. What are you hiding there?
Me: Nothing important.
Stella: Aha! I see it. Those nasty nail clippers! Lady Human, for shame! You lied to a dog.
Me: When did I lie?
Stella: Hiding toenail clippers during a spa session is a physical lie. You don’t tell it with your tongue. You tell it with your sneaky, sneaky hand.
Me: You are always so laid back during massage time, I just thought I would take advantage of the calm and do a little trimming.
Stella: Lady Human, for shame again! Taking advantage of a bulldog’s good nature and love of belly scratching!
Me: Why can’t I see some of that bulldog good nature when I need to trim your nails?
Stella: After the first clip or two, it’s all used up.
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Bulldoggy 