I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. Humans have annoying habits. I plan to make a long list of them some day. Lady Human has the annoying habit of telling Doodlebug what a ‘good boy’ he is. Over and over again, she says, ‘Who’s a good boy?’ As Doodlebug is the only boy dog here, the answer is obvious. The question need not be asked. If there is a good boy, it has to be Doodlebug. Nobody else qualifies.
Me: What’s wrong with encouraging Doodlebug with some positive words? So, I call him a ‘good boy’ when he does what he is told.
Stella: Tell me, Lady Human, what great feat did he perform to merit all this praise? Did he save human or dog lives? Did he climb a mighty mountain or swim across a sea? Did he bake enough treats for all of us to have our fill?
Me: Well, no. Not any of those things.
Stella: Why is he such a ‘good boy’ then?
Me: He stopped rampaging when I asked him. And he went into his crate when it was time for me to go to the store. And…
Stella: Woo-hoo! Good boy, Doodlebug!
Doodlebug: I know.
Stella: You know, don’t you, ‘good boy’,that cooperation goes against everything we bulldogs stand for.
Me: Don’t I tell you that you are a good girl?
Stella: Not nearly often enough.
Me: Good girl.
Stella: Well, yeah.
Me: Aw, Stella, who’s a good girl?
Stella: I am?
Me: You had better believe it, good girl!
Stella: I am a good girl. Take that, Doodlebug! I am a good girl!
Doodlebug: I know. And I’m a good boy. What’s the big deal?
Copyright 2017 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.
Bulldoggy 