Stink Eye 2.0 – Conversations with Stella

I received the infamous Stink Eye from Snoopey today.

Stella:    As an Olde English Bulldogge myself, I greatly appreciate Snoopey’s skill at delivering the Stink Eye. She is an artist.

Me:        Well, I don’t find it to be a work of art.

Stella:    Why did she shoot the Stink Eye at you? Did you cave in to it? Did you show weakness?

Me:        No, I did not cave or show weakness. What kind of human would I be if I did? She objected to me letting you out for a sunbath before I let her out.

Stella:    What? Queen Stella comes first. How dare she?

Me:        She did not appreciate it. She gave me a sidelong, extended Stink Eye, bulldog-style. Now I understand that she is the pack leader among the dogs and I respect that.

Stella:    Yes, every day you open her crate first and she gets first pick on treats. I don’t like it, but I tolerate it.

Me:        So how is it that Snoopey is pack leader and you are the Queen?

Stella:    The Queen is royal and regal and dignified. That’s me all over.  The pack leader defends, watches, warns, balances. That is Snoopey all over. I admire her. But she has no right to sunbathe before me! No! No! No!

Me:        I’ll try to balance your competing interests.

Stella:    No competition. I win. I am the Queen. A queen without a crown…hint, hint.

Me:        I still haven’t found a suitable one. I could make you one out of…

Stella:    Don’t say cardboard. Nope. Real crown.

Me:        What about plast…

Stella:    Nope. No plastic.

Me:        You stopped me too soon. What about plaster?

Stella:    Plaster. Hmmm. Nope. I don’t know what it is, but it sounds cheap. My crown should be expensive.

Me:        I’ll keep working on it.

Stella:    Work harder! Work faster!

Me:        Or what?

Stella:    Oh, I think you know. If you don’t, go ask Snoopey Stink Eye.

 

 

Copyright 2016 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.

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