You’re All Wet! – Conversations with Stella

I AM STELLA, QUEEN OF THE OLDE ENGLISH BULLDOGGES! HERE ME ROAR!

Me:        Is that what that noise was? I thought you were choking on something. What a relief!

Stella:    Silence, peasant!

Me:        Excuse me?

Stella:    You are excused.

Me:        Stella, remember? “No rude, no crude, no bulldog mood.”

Stella:    Yes, I remember. Sounds like something a human would say.

Me:        It is.

Stella:    You are all wet. You are dripping on the floor. How come?

Me:        Miss Sweetie and I had a difference of opinion about whether or not she would take a bath. I won. And I lost.

Stella:    Hahaha! Well, she does smell better. So I think we all won. But you are still all wet.

Me:        I’ll dry out. One of the great things about being human is our ability to change clothes. One of the great things about wrestling Miss Sweetie over a bath is that I get a wonderful physical workout. 70 pounds of bulldog pulling this way and that makes me work for my victory.

Stella:    Any day Miss Sweetie smells good is a victory for all of us. Congratulations!

Me:        That reminds me. You are about due for a bath yourself.

Stella:    Whaaagggttt? Naw. It wasn’t that long ago. You are all wet.

Me:        So if I dry out and give you a bath, you are saying that I will be all wet again?

Stella:    Well, not on purpose. But yes, on purpose. Have you seen my shake and roll?

Me:        Uh-huh.

Stella:    I can sling it. Yeah, I can. Do you doubt it?

Me:        Nope.

Stella:    I am going to get a bath, am I not?

Me:        Yep. And that’s not a bad thing, my friend.

Stella:    It’s all right in the aftermath. Or afterbath.

 

 

Copyright 2016 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.

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