I have a question for Stella, the Olde English Bulldogge…
Stella: Queen!
Me: Whatever. Why do bulldogs stick out their tongues?
Stella: Tongues need fresh air. It is a bulldog thing. Other dogs do it. Bulldogs do it best.
Me: But why?
Stella: Don’t humans stick their tongues out?
Me: Only to lick our lips or to be rude.
Stella: How is sticking your tongue out rude?
Me: To humans, it means something like, ‘I don’t care what you think. In your face.’
Stella: How is that rude?
Me: Believe me. When humans do it, it’s rude. It’s the attitude behind it.
Stella: I have no attitude behind sticking my tongue out. I do it because it feels good to me and it cools me off a little and it is a bulldog move and I am proud to be a bulldog.
Me: All right. I understand. What about when you stick your tongue out while you are sunbathing, which I have observed you are doing on a regular basis now. You never used to sunbathe.
Stella: My tongue can use a little sun, too.
Me: Aren’t you concerned that your tongue may get sunburnt?
Stella: Nope. Bulldog tongues are tough. The sun would never dare to burn our tongues.
Me: What would happen if it did?
Stella: We would have to attack that old sun and lick it until we put it out.
Me: A huge pack of bulldogs attacking the sun. I can imagine that.
Stella: Are we getting back on that imagining thing?
Me: It would take a large effort from NASA.
Stella: What is NASA? Is that a bulldog group?
Me: In a way. Keep sticking your tongue out, Stella.
Copyright 2016 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.