
I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges.

Sweetie: Lady Human, the cat is being her weird self again.

MoonCat: Meow. How can a bulldog call a cat weird?
Me: What’s going on?
Doodlebug: MoonCat is going around and taking sips from our water bowls.
Sweetie: Yeah. Thoroughly unsanitary.
Me: Well, I guess a bulldog would know about unsanitary. MoonCat, is something wrong with your own water?
MoonCat: No. I just like to sample other bowls. Don’t humans do that?
Me: Well, yes. In fact, in some restaurants, they have a wine expert called a sommelier who will sample a bottle of wine first for the guests to make sure it’s good.
Sweetie: I wouldn’t mind doing that job.
Me: Sorry, girl, no wine for dogs. Not good for you.
Sweetie: Oh, but a cat can stick her cat tongue in my bulldog water and that’s okay? Wait and see how you like it.
Me: What do you mean?
Doodlebug: Nothing. But if I were you, I wouldn’t leave anything you’ve been drinking out of within cat reach.
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