I’ll Have What You’re Having – Conversations with Stella

I am Stella, Illustrious Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. Yes! Illustrious! That’s me. I like that. A young friend called me that and I am going to keep it, just like I keep everything else. Speaking of which, why do humans spend so much time staring into the Big Cold Box in the kitchen?

Me:        We check for ingredients for our meals. Sometimes we don’t know what we want to eat and we have to think about it.

Stella:    You think about food? What is there to think about? Food is food! When you see it, grab it and eat it before someone else does! Let me in there. Let me see what all you have in there. I won’t have to think about it.

Me:        No, we don’t need a bulldog nose sniffing around in the refrigerator.

Stella:    But you sniff around in there.

Me:        I look first and then I sniff.

Stella:    What are you going to eat now?

Me:        Well, there are some sliced apples.

Stella:    Nope.

Me:        Pineapple.

Stella:    Why is everything called ‘apple’? Nope, no fruit.

Me:        I could cook some eggs.

Stella:    Mmmm. Maybe. What else do we have?

Me:        We?

Stella:    We are family, aren’t we? Don’t you love us? You are generous, aren’t you? Wait! Are you a food hoarder, Lady Human?

Me:        Well, of course…Yes, we love…We try to be…No, we are not food hoarders!

Stella:    Thank you for sharing. We will have some of what you are having. On second thought, we are bulldogs. We have a lot of what you are having.

Me:        You bulldogs are on a special diet so you won’t have stomach or skin problems.

Stella:    Sounds like an excuse not to share your food with us.

Me:        More like a reason for you not to share your upset stomachs with us. No, thank you.

Stella:    Well, it’s unfair, but I can’t force you to share. I bet I know what I’ll be dreaming about tonight though. Food, glorious food, and the Big Cold Boxes it comes in.



Copyright 2016 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.