Outside the Closed Door – Conversations with Stella

I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. Knock, knock.

Me:        Who’s there?

Stella:    I just said. I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges.

Me:        Come on in.

Stella:    The door is closed.

Me:        Just bump it open with your nose.

Stella:    I’m not sure.

Me:        Why? Come on it.

Stella:    What’s in there?

Me:        You’ve seen my room. You sleep in it every night,

Stella:    Why is the door closed?

Me:        Humans need privacy sometimes from other humans…and bulldogs.

Stella:    So I should not come in.

Me:        No, you should come in. I am inviting you.

Stella:    Open the door then.

Me:        I can’t reach it right now. Just bump it with your nose.

Stella:    Easy for you to say. I don’t see you bumping doors open with your nose.

Me:        I’ve seen you do it before.

Stella:    What if I open the door and you are not there? Closed doors are mysterious.

Me:        You can hear me.

Stella:    What if I bump the door open and I get trapped in your room.

Me:        Not big deal. I will let you out.

Stella:    You will open the door?

Me:        Sure.

Stella:    So, open the door now. I knew you were holding back on me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Copyright 2018 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.

Do the Bulldog Conga – Conversations with Stella

Hello! I am Stella, still Illustrious Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges, feeling a little left out the past few days as Lady Human and Tall Man have been partying with humans and have not even had the decency to bring home leftovers or include us in their human shenanigans.

Me:        I am sorry. No bulldogs were invited.

Stella:    For shame, Lady Human! A whole world of bulldogs and none were allowed. Without bulldogs, I’ll bet it was boring.

Me:        No. It was pretty fun. One of the guests pulled me into a conga line and I actually danced. Well, it was more like a slow run, but I still did it. That’s so unlike me.

Stella:    What is a ‘conga line’?

Me:        Everybody gets in a line and you put your hands on the shoulders of the person in front of you and you start moving to the music. Our line snaked around the room in between tables, and we danced until the music stopped.

Stella:    More like slow running.

Me:        Yeah, but we laughed a lot.

Stella:    Bulldogs can conga line. We put our feet on each other’s shoulders all the time. And we can slow run. We might fall off, but we can climb back on.

Me:        And someone will snarl. And someone will snap or growl. And then a fight might break out.

Stella:    Exactly, just like the humans. We would feel right at home.

Me:        It was probably better that there were no bulldogs allowed. It might have gotten overcrowded.

Stella:    We still should have been invited. That would’ve been polite.

Me:        But then we would have had to invite collies and corgis.

Stella:    I like collies and corgis.

Me:        And Labradors and poodles.

Stella:    I like Labradors and poodles.

Me:        And then we would have had to invite cats.

Stella:    NO! ABSOLUTELY NOT! NO CATS ALLOWED! If cats come to a party, I won’t attend!

Me:        What’s so bad about cats at a party?

Stella:    Cats do NOT know how to conga!

 

 

Copyright 2017 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.