I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. This is unbearable! It must stop!
Me: Unbearable what? Stop what?
Stella: It’s Wiggles. She lays around wherever. She eats whatever. She is constantly demanding attention from you, attention that rightfully belongs to me! And…
Me: And…?
Stella: Every time I leave the room, she scoots into my special place! Now it smells more like her than it does like me. And I like my smell better than hers. She has taken over the world!
Me: I believe that is a bit of an overstatement. The world is a pretty big place.
Stella: You must stop her, Lady Human! Hold one of those silly human elections of yours.
Me: I don’t believe that would work. Wiggles just does what Wiggles wants to do. Nobody elected her.
Stella: But I am the Queen!
Me: Nobody elected you either.
Stella: I elected me! That’s all it takes!
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