I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. RUN!
Wiggles: Run? Where? There’s no place to run!
Tiger: What is going on?
Stella: Lady Human! She has them in her hand. She is trying to hide them. But I can see better than she can hide. RUN!
Doodlebug: The nail snippers! RUN!
Miss Sweetie: I will not run. I will dig little holes and hide my toes in the dirt. No snipping toesies in the dirt. Yay, me!
Me: Hey, Sweetie, how about a dip in the puppy pool?
Tiger: Sweetie, beware!
Stella: Lady Human, what kind of scheme is this?
Stella: To sneak up on us when we are enjoying something we enjoy and snip our toenails.
Me: Look, I want your nails to look nice. And for you not to gouge yourselves with them. I just cut my own nails for the same reason.
Stella: We are standing together against this intrusion on our personal space. Set the clippers down, Lady Human, and step away from them. SLOWLY. Keep your hands where we can see them.
Me: The humans would love for the salons all to be open now. To get their nails trimmed and polished so that they shine.
Stella: More proof. Humans are weird.
Me: People pay a lot of money to have their nails done.
Wiggles: People pay? With that money stuff that they could use to buy treats? The world of humans is a crazy place.
Doodlebug: Lady Human, skip that trimming thing. Can you polish my nails and make them shine? A handsome dog deserves handsome shiny nails and I am a handsome fella.
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