I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. Woo-woo-woah-woo-hoo-hoo! Woo-wah-wooah-woo-hooah-oh-woo-hoo-ah…
Me: Stella! What the freak is going on?
Stella: I am singing. These are the songs of my people.
Me: Your people sing high-pitched, screechy songs?
Stella: Yes, just the same as the songs you sing.
Me: Please tone it down.
Stella: Then I would not be singing our special songs. I would be singing boring, dull, crummy songs, and what’s the point in that?
Me: The point is they would not hurt my ears. The point is that this is settle down time. Do you know what the old cowboys used to do when they wanted to calm the cattle down for the night?
Stella: Yes, they would have their bulldogs sing them cowboy songs.
Me: No. bulldog songs would have stampeded the herd.
Stella: Mmmm, stampede. I like the sound of that.
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