I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. I am a dignified animal, except when I am scratching my rear end on the patio, but I will not talk about that here.
Wiggles: I will. Stella scratches her rear end on the patio.
Stella: Hush your mouth!
Wiggles: As a matter of fact, I am celebrating the arrival of spring, as Lady Human calls it, by using the hard patio as a back rub. Mmmm, feels so good. Dry and warm.
Me: That’s great! Wiggles is wiggling on her back on the concrete!
Wiggles: Hey, I wiggles standing up and I wiggles walking around and I wiggles on my back. That’s why everybody calls me ‘Wiggles’. Yay me!
Stella: Stop it! You look ridiculous!
Wiggles: Maybe. Maybe. But my back feels good.
Stella: Make her stop, Lady Human.
Me: She’s not doing anything wrong. It won’t hurt her.
Stella: No, but just watching her is making me feel itchy all over. Especially my rear end which…I must…scratch on the concrete now.
Wiggles: This concrete is great. Who invented this stuff? Must have been an itchy bulldog.
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