I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges.
Doodlebug: May I say something, please?
Stella: Since you asked so nicely, maybe.
Doodlebug: Maybe? Does that mean ‘yes’? Because I think it means I can, so here goes. Why do we have a fence? Why am I not allowed outside the fence by myself?
Stella: Two questions! You were only allowed one. That is a violation of the rules. I make the rules which makes the rules important.
Me: I can answer both of those questions.
Stella: That would be two answers! He was only allowed one question…maybe. As usual, Doodle is taking too much on himself.
Me: And I think that right there answers his second question. How about if I answer the first question then?
Stella: Oh, very well.
Me: The answer to why we have a fence goes a long way back.
Stella: Oh, no. It’s going to be THAT kind of answer. Long, boring, ancient history.
Me: Not ancient.
Stella: Did it happen before I was born?
Stella: Ancient history, which is always long and boring because it has nothing to do with me.
Me: Many, many years ago…
Stella: Here we go.
Me: …when Tall Man was very young…
Stella: A puppy.
Me: No, never a puppy. A young human. Anyway, we built a tall fence to keep Tall Man safe…
Stella: Did you call him ‘Tall Boy’ in those days?
Me: No. Anyway, we built a strong, tall fence so he could play outside and not wander off and not have strangers bother him. When you all came along, it served us well to protect you, too.
Doodlebug: Does Tall Man have to stay inside the fence?
Me: No, he is a grown man now. He comes and goes as he pleases.
Doodlebug: Well, I am a grown bulldog now. I should get to come and go as I please.
Doodlebug: How come?
Stella: Lady Human, allow me. Because Tall Man knows how to behave in public. We know that he will not pick fights with people or dogs. We are not so sure about you, tough guy. Tall Man does not jump on people or dogs, even in friendship. He does not wander around using the bathroom on the property of other people. He does not accept rides from strangers. He does not chew up things he finds on the ground. He never, and I do mean NEVER, eats dog poop. And when he wants to come home, he knows exactly where home is.
Me: I couldn’t have said it better myself.
Doodlebug: Hmmmppphh! I could do… or not do all those things, only I don’t want to.
Stella: Thank the Great Creator for fences.
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