Numpties – Conversations with Stella and the Pack


I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. I am a numpty.

Me:  No, I don’t think you really are. Do you know what a numpty is?

Stella:  It is what smart humans call bulldogs.

Me:  Well, it is a British term from what I understand. They can be pretty smart. But numpty means stupid or silly. So… yeah, I guess bulldogs could be called numpties every so often.

Miss Sweetie:  I want to be British. I want to be a British numpty.

Me:  That’s kind of hard since y’all are from here.

Doodlebug:  Hey, I’m numptier than Sweetie! I can’t build my own potty like she can.

Tiger:  What do you get for being a numpty? Are there special treats?

Me:  No.

Tiger:  So, what good is it to be a numpty?

Me:  You may make some people laugh.

Tiger:  If that’s all, I’m not interested.

Wiggles:  Can a Texas bulldog be a numpty?

Me:  If you mean can Texas bulldogs be silly or do dumb things, what do you think?

Wiggles:  No. No. We are way too serious to be numpties. Come on, y’all! Let’s go get the chickens to kick eggs and chicken feed out to us! Snack time!

Tiger:  I don’t mind if I do.

Doodlebug:  Let’s jump on the picnic table!

Miss Sweetie:  Hey, the puppy pool is full of cold water from the storm! Swimming time!

Me:  No, Sweetie, it’s still too cold. I’m going to dump it.

Miss Sweetie:  No, don’t waste good rainwater, Lady Human! It’s perfect for numpties.

Me:  You may be right. Excuse me , Stella, while I go stop Sweetie from becoming a cold, wet dog. What about you, girl? What silliness are you going to engage in?

Stella:  Me?  I’m staying inside, ma’am. I am going to stretch out and take a nice, long nap. After all, I’m no numpty.











Copyright 2019 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.





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