I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. I have made up a song of my people because of the wind today that won’t slow down and won’t stop blowing. Mmmm. Ahammm! Oh, the wild weird wind will blow, blow, blow and will not slow, slow, slow, and it’s so cold, cold, cold, so on, on, on it will go, go, go, it never stops, oh, no, no, no!
Me: Why is the wind ‘weird’?
Stella: Because it was not blowing and then it was. And that was weird. So, if something is weird, go ahead and call it weird. Might as well be honest. And besides, it is very, very cold, and that is weird.
Me: It is winter. How is the cold weird?
Stella: Lady Human, please pay attention.
Me: I’ll try.
Stella: We are in Texas.
Stella: Where did this cold wind come from? Texas?
Stella: You see. Weird, huh?
Me: It came from the Arctic, far, far north of here.
Stella: Exactly. Weird. And why did they send their strong, cold wind here?
Me: I don’t believe that they sent it.
Stella: Of course, they did. How else did it get here?
Stella: Don’t go into one of your long, boring explanations that makes no sense whatsoever. Somebody sent a cold, hard wind here that just keeps blowing and blowing and blowing and…
Me: Welcome to winter.
Stella: Winter? I don’t remember having to put up with this sort of thing before.
Me: Winter is back.
Stella: Well, tell it to pack its bags and go back where it came from.
Me: We need winter. Winter kills off the bad bugs.
Stella: Get a can of bug spray.
Copyright 2019 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.