My Special Rain Place – Conversations with Stella

I am Stella, Queen Illustrious and Noble, Queen of the Old English Bulldogges. QUEEN! As Queen, I should be able to do what I want when I want, but I find that the humans have other plans. Why?

Me:        Why what?

Stella:    Why can’t I pee where I want?

Me:        I think you pretty much do. Though you are good about not peeing inside the house or garage and I can’t tell you how much I appreciate that.

Stella:    I am not talking about the house. I know that is not a bathroom spot – except for humans who are privileged, I suppose. Anyway, I am talking about the yard on rainy days.

Me:        Yes?

Stella:    I have a special rain spot.

Me:        I know and I have never understood why.

Stella:    Why? Why? Wait a second. Why? Oh, yeah. On rainy days, I must pee in the small yard by the driveway. Period. Done deal.

Me:        But why? It is the same property, the same ground. The only difference is that there is a fence separating the back yard from the driveway area and garden. I have never understood why you won’t go out in the yard in the rain, but you will go in the driveway area. It makes no sense.

Stella:    It makes perfect bulldog sense.

Me:        Please explain perfect bulldog sense which makes no sense to me.

Stella:    It’s because all the other bulldogs use the yard on rainy days, that’s why!

Me:        So?

Stella:    Don’t you understand, Lady Human? Rain makes everything run together.

Me:        Okay?

Stella:    Yuck! I don’t want to walk in diluted pee-pee! At least, in my special rain place, all the pee is just me.

Me:        I hate to admit it, Stella, but that makes some sense.

Stella:    Think about it. My footprints in the mud. My puddles. Not shared with anyone else. I am a queen. My special rain place.

Me:        Okay. I get it.

Stella:    And now the next step will be to get my own indoor bathroom.

Me:        Uh-oh.



Copyright 2017 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.


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