I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. And I am waiting.
Me: Waiting for what?
Stella: You know!
Me: Uhhbbb, no, I don’t.
Stella: Uhhbbb, yes, you do. Is your memory fading, Lady Human?
Me: I don’t think so. Could you be a little more specific?
Stella: I would be glad to, but I don’t know what ‘specific’ means.
Me: Exactly what are you waiting for?
Me: I give you treats every day.
Stella: Not those treats. Those treats are not treaty enough.
Stella: Hey, everybody else is making up new words. Treaty is mine.
Me: You realize that ‘treaty’ is already a word that means something other than…treats.
Stella: Beside the point. Where are my treaty treats?
Me: Oh, the chicken jerky treats!
Stella: Oh, now you remember!
Me: I haven’t gotten by the store that sells them yet.
Stella: You said you would bring them. Terms of delivery. Isn’t that what humans say? Isn’t that a promise?
Stella: Terms of delivery, Lady Human. Where are the treats?
Me: I haven’t had time this week.
Stella: For shame, Lady Human! You lied to a dog!
Me: I’ll get them. I promise.
Stella: Too little, too late!
Me: So, you don’t want the chicken treats?
Stella: Did I say that?
Me: Sort of.
Stella: If you believe that, I have been totally misrepresented.
Me: Misrepresented by yourself?
Stella: Don’t try to confuse me! I am already confused enough as it is. Bring me my treats!
Me: All right. Double effort tomorrow to get to the feed store to pick up a bag of chicken treats.
Stella: Don’t let me down, Lady Human. Never lie to a dog!
Copyright 2018 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.