I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges…
Me: Can someone tell me what went on outside?
Stella: Many mysterious things go on outside, Lady Human. Can you be specific?
Me: Yes. I found a small apple which had one piece sliced off, obviously by a human. Alongside it was a long scrap of orange fabric.
Snoopey: Not really. Where did you find this, Lady Human?
Wiggles: They were under the pecan tree. Nobody, no human that is, threw them there. The trajectory was wrong.
Me: Trajectory? You know about trajectory?
Wiggles: Common sense, Lady Human.
Miss Sweetie: Is this a trick, Lady Human? Did you drop them, so we could find them? I mean, fruit? Really?
Me: No, Sweetie, I did not drop them out there or anywhere. And they weren’t out there early this morning.
Tiger: Maybe Jerky McSquirrelyFace dropped them from the tree. A sort of peace offering?
Stella: Yuck. He may have poisoned them. Where are they, Lady Human?
Me: I threw them away immediately and washed my hands. There were long, thin scrapes on the apple and an edge had been bitten off by a small mouth.
Stella: The mystery of the apple and the cloth. Jerky could have done it. I doubt it was a peace offering though. Wait. What about the hawks? They could have dropped them.
Tiger: Why would they give up a good piece of fruit?
Stella: The crows could have been chasing them. And the hawks prefer fresh meat, not nasty throw aways like apples. They like things like…small bulldogs! NOOO!!!
Me: No problem, Stella. The hawks are not coming for you.
Stella: Well, who did drop the apple and the cloth? Did the Great Creator drop it as a gift?
Me: Not impossible, but generally the Great Creator uses humans to deal with fruit and cloth deliveries. Bottom line, if any of you find anything weird outside, please don’t eat it. Please alert me or Tall Man so we can check it out. Okay?
Miss Sweetie: Maybe.
Doodlebug: I’ll think about it. Depends on how good, or bad, it smells. The worse, the better.
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