I, Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges, hereby declare today HAPPY TIGER BIRTHDAY!
Me: You mean that Tiger is happy?
Stella: No, Tiger is always serious. Except around Tall Man. And you sometimes, Lady Human.
Me: So, what you are really declaring is that today is Tiger’s Birthday. Happy Birthday, Tiger!
Tiger: Thank you!
Me: Special treat disbursement in honor of Tiger’s birthday!
Stella: Yea! Happy Birthday, Tiger!
Miss Sweetie: Yea! Happy Birthday!
Doodlebug: Yea! Happy Birthday!
Wiggles: Oh, boy! What is it called? Happy Burpday!
Snoopey: Okay, yeah, whatever.
Me: Snoopey, wish Tiger a happy birthday.
Snoopey: Why should I? She yells at me all the time. She prisses around and gives me the stink eye. Maybe I just don’t like her. Maybe I just don’t want to wish her a ‘happy’ birthday.
Stella: Are we having cake?
Me: No, just bulldog treats.
Stella: Wait, what? Are you taking some of our bulldog treats?
Me: No, you all are having treats. Not me.
Stella: Not even human cake?
Me: I’ve cut back on human cake. I don’t even necessarily have cake on my own birthday.
Stella: That’s sad, Lady Human. Not as sad as taking our treats, but still sad.
Me: There are lots of ways to celebrate birthdays. It doesn’t have to be with food.
Stella: Bite your tongue! But only if it tastes good.
Copyright 2017 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.