I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges.
Me: Okay, settle down time. Come on, boy. Come on, Sweetie.
Doodlebug: Nope. I’m fine right here.
Me: No, you’re not.
Sweetie: We just doing us, Lady Human.
Me: You’re doing bulldoggery, which is ten times worse than being bulldoggy. Now come on in the other room.
Sweetie: I think not. What are you doing now?
Me: I’m trying to pick you up. It’s like wrestling an 80-pound concrete block.
Sweetie: Cool!
Doodlebug: Try to pick me up, Lady Human.
Me: No, you’re a 75-pound rock. What’s going on?
MoonCat: We are doing the bulldog thing.
Me: You, too?
MoonCat: Yep. Pack member. I have to start sometime.
Me: Well, I guess I’ll just have to take these cheese crackers with me then…
Doodlebug: What? Crackers? Wait for me!
Sweetie: Crackers? Why didn’t you say so? Crackers change everything.
Doodlebug: Okay, everybody. Bulldoggery is cancelled…well, postponed at least.
Copyright 2022 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.
Bulldoggy 
I want to hug them all
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They were like hairy boulders. They literally would not move a step and that’s when I discovered for all my conceit otherwise that I could not physically budge a stock-still, determined bulldog of 75 – 81.5 lbs. without a convincing bribe.
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Even my 25lb need bribes.
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Bribery has such a bad reputation. It is so underrated in the bulldog world.
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In the frenchie world but especially in the pug world.
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