I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. Lady Human, that fake dog that Tall Man gave you is staring at me. Make him stop.
Me: Stella, you know that the fake dog is not a real animal. I let you sniff it and you seemed satisfied.
Stella: Why do you need a fake dog when you have me?
Me: The fake dog is a stuffed toy given as a token love gift. It is not a substitute for you. You are real. You are alive.
Stella: He is staring at me. How dare he?
Me: IT is just sitting where I placed IT. Do you want me to turn IT around so IT is not “looking” in your direction?
Stella: No. If you do, he might get mad. Better that he and I meet eye-to-eye, predator to predator. What is that in his mouth? A bone? Is he taunting me?
Me: He…It is not real. I’ll admit that it’s soft. It’s cute. It smells good. It was a gift from someone I love.
Stella: So, you like him more than me?
Me: When I pet you, you are soft. When I look at your face, you are cute. When I smell your scent, you smell…okay. And I believe with all my heart that you were a gift from God.
Stella: You hear that, Fake Dog! So there! In your face! Wait! Is he angry?
Me: Tell you what. Let me tuck it right back here on my headboard where I can see it, and you can’t. Better?
Stella: Better. Not perfect. I know you’re there, Fake Dog! Don’t try anything!
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