I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. Chickens are ignorant. If you attempt to talk to them, you are wasting your time. People say that chickens are intelligent, but people are wrong. How can they be all that smart with those tiny little heads and pointy faces?
If you start a conversation with a chicken, you will end up disappointed.
Me: Well, let’s try this. Hey! Squawky! What’s going on?
Squawky the Silkie Chicken: Waaakk!
Stella: You see! She doesn’t even know how to pronounce her own name.
Me: Maybe she was not saying her name.
Squawky the Silkie Chicken: Waaakk waak!
Stella: There! That’s not even the same thing. She doesn’t know what she is saying.
Me: Maybe she is saying ‘hello’.
Stella: That is too many noises for ‘hello’. Let me ask her a question. WHAT IS YOUR NAME?
Me: You don’t have to yell.
Stella: I DO IF I WANT HER TO UNDERSTAND ME! SHE DOESN’T SPEAK BULLDOG!
Me: No yelling.
Squawky the Silkie Chicken: Waaaak! Waaak! Waak. Waak. Waak.
Stella: It’s just getting worse. Poor little chicken brain.
Squawky the Silkie Chicken: Human, please tell your other bulldog to stop digging at our food. It is not for her.
Me: Wow. That was pretty clear.
Stella: She has been holding out on us.
Me: If you have sway with Wiggles, tell her to leave the chicken feed alone.
Stella: Yeah, she sure doesn’t want her big old bulldog face to meet the angry pointy-faced chickens. I think talking to chickens is a dangerous proposition, Lady Human. Can we trust them?
Squawky the Silkie Chicken: Waaaaaaakkk!
Copyright 2018 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.