It’s Rude to Stare – Conversations with the Pack

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges.

Sweetie: Don’t look now, but the beady eyed birds are staring.

Doodlebug: At what?

Sweetie: I said don’t look!

Me: Why are you all agitated?

Doodlebug: Sweetie thinks the little budgies are staring at us.

Me: Well, apparently they are.

Sweetie: They’re invading our space with their eyeballs.

MoonCat: I don’t mind. When someone stares at me, it just means that they’re admitting the truth. I’m good to look at.

©️ 2025 H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

Thinking – Conversations with the Pack

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges.

Sweetie: How come you’re so quiet, Lady Human?

Me: I’m just thinking.

Doodlebug: Uh-oh.

MoonCat: A human thinking. Never a good thing. Hide!

Me: No, nothing bad. It’s just another holiday. New Year’s.

Sweetie: Where is its tree?

Me: New Year’s doesn’t get its own tree.

Doodlebug: Poor New Year’s. What does it get?

Me: Some people party. Some people cook a bunch of food. Some people shoot off fireworks. And some people like me are just quiet and think a lot. About the past. About the future.

Sweetie: About the food? Where are those food people? Let’s go New Year with them!

Copyright 2024. H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

Why is There a Tree in Our House? – Conversations with Doodlebug and Sweetie

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges. Lady Human, someone has made a mistake and brought a dead tree into our house.

Sweetie: No, they did it on purpose. They do this all the time.

Me: Not really. Just once a year. It’s Christmas.

Doodlebug: Did you bring it inside so the little birds could play on it?

Sweetie: Did you bring it in so it wouldn’t get wet and cold?

Me: No, it’s a traditional decoration for Christmas. You’ve seen them before. Not a big deal.

Sweetie: Uh, a tree in our house? Looks like a big deal to me.

Doodlebug: So if it keeps raining, can I just hike my leg and…

Me and Sweetie: NO!

Copyright 2024 H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

The Passing of Little Friend – Conversations with the Pack

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges. What is that laying in your hand, Lady Human?

Sweetie: It looks like…IT IS! ONE OF OUR PARAKEETS!

Me: NO! No, it’s not! Look! Both of our parakeets are still here! Tall Man found this little parakeet outside on the patio fence. He must have flown in and sat down and…passed away.

MoonCat: I had nothing to do with that.

Me: I know, girl. I guess this little guy escaped from his home, wherever that was. He was lost. And it’s been so cold these last few mornings that he just couldn’t make it and…

Doodlebug: He flew here because it was safe.

Me: But it was too late and we didn’t know about him.

MoonCat: And he perched on our fence.

Sweetie: Why did he come here? He could have gone anywhere.

Me: Maybe…

Sweetie: The Great Creator. He knew.

Me: This is so strange. Nothing like this has ever happened to us before.

Doodlebug: Just like when we all came here. Not an accident.

Me: The Lord Jesus said something very interesting about little birds. He said that the fall of even a tiny sparrow doesn’t happen without the Heavenly Father’s notice.

Sweetie: He should have a name. Everyone should have a name.

Me: All right. I’m going to call him ‘Little Tejas’. It’s the name of our home. Texas. It comes from an old Caddoan word that means ‘friend’.

Doodlebug: A little friend just passing through.

Me: Well, he’s home now.

Copyright 2024. H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

A Bulldog Thank You – Conversations with the Pack

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges. Lots of human food, Lady Human.

Me: Yep. Thanksgiving is food heavy. But it’s really about thanking the Great Creator of All for every good thing.

Sweetie: Like food.

Me: Yep.

MoonCat: And soft pillows.

Me: Yep.

Doodlebug: And not having to pee in the rain.

Sweetie: That one is at the top of every bulldog’s “thankful for” list.

Me: It’s pretty high up there on my “thankful for” list, too.

Copyright 2024 H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

Good Ole Days – Conversations with the Pack

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges.

Sweetie: What happened, Lady Human?

Me: What happened to what?

MoonCat: Don’t get her started, ma’am. You know these questions never make sense.

Sweetie: What happened to all the good ole days?

MoonCat: I warned you.

Doodlebug: Sweetie’s just bored.

Sweetie: I never used to be bored back in the good ole days.

Me: Why can’t these be the good new days?

Sweetie: You tell me, Lady Human. You’re the one in charge of entertainment.

Copyright 2024 H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

Fix It – Conversations with the Pack

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges.

Sweetie: Lady Human, there is a problem.

Me: There usually is somewhere.

Sweetie: My big blue chair is leaning. My back half is lower than my front half.

MoonCat: Isn’t that always the case?

Me: Well, the wooden frame under the chair has cracked clean in two so that side is down on the floor.

Sweetie: Well, fix it.

Me: Is it that big a problem?

Doodlebug: Not for me. I don’t use it.

MoonCat: Maybe if someone weren’t so heavy on the back side…

Sweetie: Hey, don’t call Lady Human fat!

MoonCat: Hmmm. Was that what I meant?

Copyright 2024 H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

Monsters – Conversations with the Parakeet Pack

Posted on by H.J. Hill

Me: So how are y’all doing?

Bud: Eeeeek! Eeek! Eek!

Baby: EEEKK!!!

Me: Okay…still losing a bunch in translation here. Was that a happy eek? Or an angry eek? or…

Bud: Monsters!

Baby: Uh-huh. Yep!

Me: Do you mean the bulldogs and the cat?

Bud: Eeek! Chirp. Sharp mouth things.

Baby: Yep. Monsters with sharp mouth things.

Me: You mean teeth. Yeah. But they won’t hurt you. They can’t get to you. I know they’re big and take some getting used to.

Bud: Don’t get used to monsters.

Baby:  Yep. Never get used to monsters. Bad idea. Chirp. But thank you for the millet spray. Chirp. Good idea.

Copyright 2024 H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

Bulldogs Do It Right – Conversations with the Pack

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges.

Sweetie: Lady Human, aren’t you glad?

Me: Glad about what?

Sweetie: Having bulldogs around you all the time.

Me: Well, yeah! Y’all are great.

Doodlebug: Why?

Me: Don’t you know?

Doodlebug: We know we’re great at everything.

MoonCat: Oh, dear, here we go again.

Me: Are you good at swimming?

Sweetie: No, leave that one off the list. It doesn’t count. We were thinking about snoring and eating and drooling and…

Doodlebug: And sleeping and snorting and all the stuff that really counts. You know.

Me: Oh, all that stuff.

Copyright 2024 H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

Dozers – Conversations with the Pack

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges. Yawn!

Sweetie: Lady Human, may we please proceed with our latest nap?

Me: Well, yeah, sure. But it is still daylight. Don’t you want to. .

Doodlebug: Sleep? Yep.

Sweetie: Snooze? Yessiree!

MoonCat: Oh my word! Just get on with it then. No bulldog gum flapping necessary.

Copyright 2024 H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

Beady Little Eyes – Conversations with Doodlebug & Sweetie

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges.

Sweetie: They’re doing it again, Lady Human. Those tiny birds are staring at us.

Me: Maybe you’re fun to stare at.

Doodlebug: How can they see anything with those beady little eyes?

Sweetie: They need to get big ole bulldog eyes like ours.

Me: A bulldog eye would be bigger than a parakeet’s entire head.

Doodlebug: Ooooo! Great!

Sweetie: Yeah! Cool! I vote for that!

Copyright 2024. H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

Speak Plainer – Part 2 Conversations with the Big Pack

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges. They are staring at me, Lady Human, and making their squeaky sounds. I think they don’t like me.

Sweetie: Hey, Parakeets! Nobody understands your teensy little squeaks! What are you talking about?

Me: Here, let’s try this. Here’s a little piece of fresh banana. Look how they’ve calmed down, just by smelling it.

Doodlebug: Oh, me, me, me! A chunk, please.

Sweetie: Don’t leave me out! Mmmm.

MoonCat: I’ll pass, thank you. Seafood will do for me.

Sweetie: Oh, this is great. Now we’re banana buddies with the birds. I still can’t understand them, but at least we share banana breath.

Copyright 2024. H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

Good Vibrations – Conversations with the Pack

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges. (Snore)

Sweetie: Why does Doodlebug snore so loud?

MoonCat: A question to which we all want the answer.

Me: Vibrations. He breathes through a narrow place in his nose and throat and the vibrations produce sound.

Sweetie: It’s so loud. I’m glad I don’t do that.

MoonCat: Hah!

Me: Actually you do. And I don’t mind. It means you’re breathing.

Doodlebug: Huh? What? Breathing in and out? Okay. I can do that. Good.

Copyright 2024. H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

Speak Plainer – Part 1 Conversations with the Big Pack

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges.

Sweetie: Look at me, birds!

Me: Look at that! They turned their heads!

Sweetie: Talk to me! What are their names, Lady Human?

Me: That tall one I call “Bud” and the smaller one I call “Baby”. For now. I may change that later.

Doodlebug: I’m glad you didn’t name me that. “Doodlebug” is just fine.

Sweetie: Hey, birds. I can’t understand you! Speak plainer! Why do they keep squeaking, Lady Human?

Me: That’s their dialect, you might say.

Doodlebug: I don’t understand.

Sweetie: I don’t get it.

MoonCat: Why does that not surprise me?

Copyright 2024 H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

Vantage Point – Conversations with the Pack

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges. Lady Human, how come MoonCat gets to sit way up there, far above us?

Sweetie: Yeah, why can’t we do that?

Me: Good question. Why can’t you do that?

Doodlebug: We’re too big?

Sweetie: We’re too heavy?

Me: Both good guesses.

Sweetie: But why would she even want to get that high above us?

MoonCat: The better to see you all, my dears.

Copyright 2024 H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

Is It Something to Eat? – Conversations with the Pack

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges. Me, first! Me, first!

Me: You first what?

Sweetie: Me first to get the food you have in your hands!

Me: Who says I have food in my hands?

Doodlebug: Aw, Lady Human, the only things you ever have in your hands are food or some mess we made that you just cleaned up. And what you’re carrying right now does not smell like a mess.

Me: Well, it’s not, but it’s not our kind of food either. It’s food for the parakeets.

Sweetie: That counts!

MoonCat: No. I guarantee you. It does not.

Copyright 2024 H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.