Buggy – Conversations with Sweetie & MoonCat

Posted on by H.J. Hill

Me: Sweetie? Why haven’t you eaten your food?

Sweetie: I can’t. There’s a bug on my bowl.

Me: Oh, it’s just a fly. Shoo it off.

Sweetie: Do you eat food that a fly has sat on?

Me: As a matter of fact…

Sweetie: Ooo! Don’t tell me!

Me: Look. A fly wouldn’t stand a chance of sitting on your bowl if your big ole bulldog mouth would eat when your food is set down and not hours later.

Sweetie: There’s just no telling where its feet have been.

MoonCat: No doubt all the same places your feet have been.

Copyright 2024 H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

Summertime Dining – Conversations with Sweetie and Doodlebug

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges. Where is supper being served?

Me: On the patio.

Sweetie: No, thank you. I’ll have mine inside if you don’t mind. Or even if you do.

Me: You used to eat on the patio all the time. I’ve noticed you ignore your food out there lately.

Sweetie: Lady Human, you don’t eat outside. How come?

Me: Well…

Sweetie: I’ll tell you how come.

Doodlebug: Oh boy, here we go.

Sweetie: It’s nasty outside in the hot. And those pesky flying pesks…

Me: Flies.

Sweetie: If you say so…those critters want to put their dirty little feet on my food. So I’ll have mine inside, thank you.

Me: How about you, Doodle?

Doodlebug: Food is food, hot weather or cold. I say, bring it on! I haven’t let a pesky fly carry off a single bite of my food yet. Not about to start now. Let’s eat!

Copyright 2023 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.

Shut Your Mouth! A Bug Might Fly In – Conversations with Stella

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. The air has turned warm. Spring has covered the trees with leaves. The sky is clear, sometimes. Everything smells wonderful and…ploof…spew…blegh! Aaaghh!

Me:        And flies. Flies enjoy warm weather, too.

Stella:    Where did it go? Let me at it! Snap! Snap!

Me:        You don’t really want to eat a fly, do you?

Stella:    Eat? No! Smoosh in my big bulldog mouth? Yes! Oh, it’s too fast. And it can fly. Hey, is that why humans call them ‘flies’?

Me:        Could be.

Stella:    Why should flies be allowed to ruin my springtime fun?

Me:        With warmer weather come insects. They have been waiting their turn.

Stella:    Get rid of them. They are buzzing my face. They are trying to invade my mouth.

Me:        Keep your mouth shut then.

Stella:    Easy for you to say. I’m a bulldog.

Me:        They are not flying into my mouth because I don’t let my mouth hang open.

Stella:    They are not flying into your mouth because you barely have a mouth. I have never understood how humans can shovel enough food into their tiny mouths to stay alive.

Me:        Well, at least we don’t have flies using our tongues as landing strips.

Stella:    Wait! Look! There’s a big one. Come on, fella! Right over here! And… SNAP! Awwwggghh! Missed! Don’t fly away! Come back here, you coward!

Me:        Escaping from a bulldog’s open mouth. Is that cowardice or uncommon good sense for a fly?

 

 

 

 

Copyright 2018 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.