Everything Not Nailed Down – Conversations with the Big Pack

Posted on by H.J. Hill

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges.

Sweetie: The wind, Lady Human! The wind.

Me: Yeah, when I was a kid, we used to say that winds like this were likely to carry off anything not nailed down.

Doodlebug: It’s about to carry me off! Nail me down!

Bud: Nail. Nail.

Me: Don’t worry. Y’all are safe inside.

MoonCat: Good. Fussing time is naptime for me. Good night.

Sweetie:  Nail me down, Lady Human, so I don’t blow away! I’m not that chubby! Really I’m not!

©️ 2025 H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

Stella’s Blog #7 – Sneaky is as Sneaky Does

Posted on by H.J. Hill

Hello! I am Stella the Olde English Bulldogge a.k.a.Queen Stella. I have to keep reminding everyone about the queen part. Even my humans have a tendency to forget my status.

And now I will jump right into my List of Offenders for the week, as always from the greatest offender to the least:

  1. Wiggles: This was a hard choice because everyone but me behaved badly all week long. Still Wiggles wins (if this award can be called a win) because she would not leave Lady Human’s shoes alone. If Lady Human wants to keep a pair of outside shoes by the back door, she should be allowed to without Wiggles or anyone else making a toy out of them. Personally, I don’t understand what is so appealing about human shoes, but to each her own.
  1. Tiger AND Snoopey: They tie for second most offensive because they could not settle down and enjoy the high winds. All their barking and turning and whining, really? And they couldn’t let that feud of theirs go even though it is calming down. They still like to get in each others’ faces for a bark fest which gets me to barking and that hurts my ears.
  1. Moon the Cat: She comes in third and was offensive this week. Why? Because CAT! Cats have this annoying way of walking that is smooth and slinky and silent. Why can’t they be normal, like dogs?
  1. Me: I admit it. I don’t like to have my nails trimmed and I gave Lady Human a run for it when she tried. She was sneaky and got 4 of them despite all my flipping and flopping. Then the tall man showed up and they tricked me. She petted my head and neck and got me all relaxed and thinking that nothing of the nail trimming sort was going on and all of a sudden all my nails had been trimmed and it wasn’t so bad. I didn’t even notice. OK. Until next time.

Did I learn anything this week? Yes. Sometimes humans are sneaky. Wiggles is quick and sneaky when she is stealing shoes. Cats are always sneaky. High winds make Tiger and Snoopey irritable and irritating to me, but at least high winds don’t sneak up on you.

My transcriptionist says that I should try saying something nice about the others. Awwww.

Signed,

Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges

 

Copyright 2016 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.