No Sweaters! – Conversations with the Pack

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges. Lady Human, why are you playing with long string? You are not a cat, are you?

Sweetie: You’re not a secret cat, are you? Because that would be too weird for words.

Me: I’m not a cat, secret or otherwise. No, the string is yarn and I am crocheting.

Sweetie: But that’s where sweaters come from!

Doodlebug: No sweaters!

Sweetie: No sweaters!

Me: I’m crocheting a little amigurami toy as a gift. 

Sweetie: Phew! That was a close call.

MoonCat: You wouldn’t happen have some leftovers of that yarn, would you? I ever so love that stuff. BUT NO SWEATERS!

©️ 2025. H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

A Refuse Pile of Notions – Conversations with the Pack

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges.

Sweetie: Lady Human, there are two big bags of stuff in my favorite napping spot. And they don’t even smell interesting.

Me: Oh, I’ll move them. Those are just some old supplies I gathered that I’ve never used. I had notions about crafting decorations and stuffed animals and crocheting some more sweaters, but I never…

Sweetie: NO! NO! NO MORE SWEATERS! EVER!

MoonCat: Lady Human, kindly drive any notion of putting a sweater on me right out of your head and into the nearest refuse pile. For once, Sweetie and I stand united.

©️ 2025.H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

Sweater Weather – Again – Conversations with the Pack

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges.

Me: Hey, y’all. It’s still pretty chilly. Here, Sweetie, try on this sweater I crocheted. Doodle, I have some more sweaters you can try…

Doodlebug: Nope.

Me: Well, go ahead and try this one, Sweetie.

Sweetie: Nope.

Me: It’s plenty big and nice and warm…

Sweetie: Nope.

Me: Okay, Doodlebug. You go ahead and…

Doodlebug: Noooooo.

Me: Come on, y’all.

Sweetie: Let me spell this like the humans do. NO!

Me: In that case, MoonCat…

MoonCat: Don’t even look in my direction.

©️ 2025 H.J. Hill. All Rights Reserved.

Keep Your Old Stuff to Yourself – Conversations with Stella

I am Stella, Queen, Olde English Bulldogge, and many other interesting things. Hello! Lady Human has been working on a string sweater for me, but it has been going slowly.

Me:        Crochet, not string. And yes, it is going slowly. I am trying to make sure that it doesn’t come undone. But I have an interim solution.

Stella:    Is an interim solution the same thing as a sweater?

Me:        It means I have something that you can use in the meantime. I just have to put in some stitch work here and there and this old crocheted scarf can fit your bulldog neck as a cowl. It will cover your neck, chest, and shoulders…

Stella:    Whoa, Lady Human! Hold up there, horsey!

Me:        Okay.

Stella:    Did you say ‘old crocheted scarf’?

Me:        Yes.

Stella:    How old?

Me:        I made it for one of my girls when she was in college. It has her school colors. But it wasn’t great. I made it in haste and I wasn’t very practiced, so when she graduated, I got it back. I was going to rework it, but it has been sitting around untouched for a couple of years now.

Stella:    You have had it since before we came?

Me:        Yes.

Stella:    So, what is really happening is that you are giving me a hand-me-down. A HAND-ME-DOWN! It belonged to someone else. A HUMAN, no less! And she didn’t want it, so give it to poor ole Stella. She’ll take it. She won’t care. She’s a dog. She’ll take anything. Poor old Stella. A crown-less queen with a hand-me-down shawl in… what colors?

Me:        Maroon and white.

Stella:    Maroo?

Me:        Maroon. It’s a very dark red.

Stella:    Yuck.

Me:        Oh, Stella. It’s just a stopgap until your cape or shawl or sweater or whatever it ends up being is ready. But if you don’t want the scarf, I suppose I can fix it for Snoopey. She always acts so grateful. When she got her new collar last month, I thought she was going to dance for joy…

Stella:    All right, Lady. The human guilt trip worked. Thank you for the scarf. It will help on the very cold days. Thankfully, there may not be many more of those. Can I wear it out only when no one else is around? I mean, as queen, I set the bulldog fashion for the neighborhood. I don’t want to waste anything. What is that human saying that you use about waste?

Me:        Waste not, want not.

Stella:    Yes. The hand-me-down scarf I will waste not, but I want not. Why couldn’t your girl have gone to a school with better school colors?

 

 

Copyright 2017 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.