Judgy Faces – Conversations with Doodlebug and Sweetie

I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges.

And I am Sweetie and I have something to say.

Me: Why should today be any different?

Doodlebug: Me first. I am the King. Lady Human, we love you despite all your faults.

Sweetie: Yes, we love you even though you don’t feed us fresh steak.

Me: I don’t even get fresh steak.

Doodlebug: We know, but we forgive you. And sometimes our meals are like 5 minutes late.

Me: But sometimes they’re an hour early…

Sweetie: And we forgive you for that, too.

Doodlebug: And sometimes you’re a little slow understanding what we want.

Me: A problem with translation, no doubt.

Doodlebug: Bottom line, we forgive you.

Sweetie: Yes. While you are far from perfect, we know you are doing the best you can. As pitiful as that is.

Copyright 2023 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.

What’s Going On? Stella’s Alert to the Pack – Conversations with Stella

Alert! Alert! Something is going on! Oh, by the way, I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. Help! Alert! Lady Human! Whatever is going on, MAKE IT STOP!

Me:        Nothing is going on except that the whole pack is barking. Why don’t you tell everyone to calm down and stop it?

Stella:    I can’t until we know the danger is past.

Me:        There is no danger.

Stella:    Yes, there is; otherwise, the pack would not be up in arms!

Me:        There is no danger.

Stella:    Why do you keep saying that? Do you think that we are insane? You are human. Humans are supposed to know everything.

Me:        Stella, the look you are giving me says that you think that I am the insane one. It’s your straight brow, the face that says you are stuck between worry and disbelief.

Stella:    I am! What is going on? Help!

Me:        What is going on? Tall Man just got home from work. That’s all that is going on. Okay. Can you calm down now?

Stella:    Tall Man? Came home?

Me:        Didn’t you see him walk through?

Stella:    Yes. But everyone was barking and jumping around. Like something was wrong. And I just assumed…

Me:        …that something was wrong, but there wasn’t. Someone heard something. It was Tall Man. Someone saw something. It was Tall Man. Someone started barking without asking why. Then everyone else started barking without asking why.

Stella:    Oh. I see. You must think we are foolish.

Me:        No more than my fellow humans who do the same thing every day.

Stella:    Lady Human, we still hope that humans know everything.

Me:        We don’t. Get used to it. Only God knows everything. And do you know what that is?

Stella:    Yep. Good news.



Copyright 2017 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.