I am Doodlebug, King of the Olde English Bulldogges.
Sweetie: Ohhhh, Lady Human…
Me: No, none of that.
Sweetie: But I’m so…
Doodlebug: Me, too!
Me: Just for the sake of argument, briefly state the problem.
Sweetie: It’s soooo…and there’s not enough…
Doodlebug: And there’s too much…and the wrong…
Me: Size? Flavor? Color? Texture? How about you, MoonCat? Anything to add?
MoonCat: My uncomplaining lips are sealed.
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Bulldoggy 