Stella, the Olde English Bulldogge, is here with me again for yet another conversation about something that has perplexed or annoyed her. And what is that today, Stella?
Stella: Some silly, rude human called Snoopey an ugly name! I heard Tall Man talking about it.
Me: And what was the ugly name?
Stella: Mug. Or pug. Or mutt. I don’t know. I didn’t understand. Human speech is confusing to me. It was not nice because Tall Man became very heated.
Me: You could tell that?
Stelka: Humans put off heat and odors when they are unhappy or snarly.
Me: I think he got mad when someone we don’t even know called Snoopey a “mutt” and suggested that she was ugly and not a real bulldog.
Stella: Ooooo! Who did that? Let me at ’em!
Me: Humans have all kinds of opinions. Most of them should be ignored. “Mutt” is not even a bad name at all. It just means not pedigreed and most mutts are sweet, adorable dogs.
Stella: Aaaggghhh! Not the point! Snoopey is a BULLDOG! BULLDOG!!! Never call a bulldog anything else.For example, never call a bulldog a “poodle”.
Me: I never would do that. I love poodles.
Stella: Never call a bulldog a “Labrador”.
Me: I never would do that. I love Labradors.
Stella: Lady Human, are you saying you don’t love bulldogs?
Me: Nope. I just find special things about all breeds.
Stella: I understand that you are trying to be nice, but NO! LOVE BULLDOGS!!! YOU ARE A BULLDOG HUMAN!!!
Me: Oh, all right. As long as I’m not a human bulldog.
Stella: Well, you may be that, too.
Copyright 2016 H.J.Hill All Rights Reserved.
