I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges.
Me: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, STELLA!
Stella: Me? Today?
Stella: Yay, me! So what are you doing special for me today? Cake?
Me: No, you know we hardly ever do cake here.
Stella: Special food!
Me: Well, maybe some peanut butter crackers.
Stella: But I get those every night. That’s not birthday special, Lady Human!
Me: How about a special rendition of the birthday song?
Stella: With an orchestra of humans?
Me: No, just me singing really loudly.
Stella: I thought this was supposed to be enjoyable. That sounds painful.
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