There’s a Bulldog on the Roof! – Conversations with Stella


I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. Do you hear it, Lady Human? There is a bulldog on the roof and you need to bring whoever it is down right now!

Me:        I hear it, girl, but it’s not a bulldog.

Stella:    I know a bulldog when I hear one. Raarr rarr raaarrr!

Me:        No, it sounds like a bulldog, but it is something else.

Stella:    I can see on the roof. Wait. No, I can’t. I’m too short. Let me move back. Okay. I see it. It is a big, weird, brown bulldog that is turning around a little now and again.

Me:        Stella, does that really look like a bulldog to you?

Stella:    Yes. No. Maybe.

Me:        That moaning, growling sound is coming from one of our roof vents. Something has jammed it or knocked it out of kilter and it’s not spinning freely.

Stella:    Why would spinny things be on our roof?

Me:        They help ventilate the crawl space under the roof.

Stella:    We have a “crawl space”. Why haven’t I seen it? I can crawl!

Me:        Believe me, it’s not suitable for bulldogs.

Stella:    Well, tell that spinny thing to stop imitating a bulldog. It’s annoying.

Me:        Yes, it is. We’ll take care of it. Until it’s fixed, you’ll only hear it when the wind kicks up.

Stella:    Then tell the wind to stop kicking it! Who does the wind think it is anyway?






Copyright 2018 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.



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