Lady Human, hold very still. There is something on your head and I think it is alive.
Me: Hello to you, too, Stella. There is nothing alive on my head, but thank you for caring. And staring.
Stella: No, really, Lady Human. Don’t move! The thing on your head is fuzzy and wiggling. I think it is trying to eat your head. Here. Just bend down and let…me…hit…it…with my big paw.
Me: I am not about to bend down so you can slap my head with your paw.
Stella: But if I don’t get it now, it may be too late! What about your brain? You need your brain!
Me: I am wearing an old knit cap from when I was in college many years ago. Tall Man found it today while we were cleaning out. It’s in good shape after all this time, don’t you think?
Stella: No, I think not.
Me: Aw, Stella, it was perfect timing. This is the first weekend that the weather has been cool enough to even consider wearing a knit hat. I think it looks good, sort of.
Stella: No, I think not.
Me: Are you a fashion critic now?
Stella: I am a dog. If I am staring at something on your head, that means you have something weird on your head. Enough said. I still think it’s alive. Did you look inside to make sure a creature had not taken up residence before you simply plopped it on your head?
Me: Of course, I did.
Stella: Better check again.
Me: Nope.
Stella: There is a fuzzy round knob on top. It is shaking. Lady Human! There may be a squirrel living in it. It would be just like a squirrel to sneak into a human’s hat.
Me: Nope.
Stella: Even if it is empty, there is another great reason to take it off.
Me: What?
Stella: It’s ugly.
Me: A matter of opinion.
Stella: Aren’t we supposed to love others?
Me: Yes.
Stella: THEN DON’T WEAR UGLY THINGS THAT OTHERS HAVE TO LOOK AT!
Copyright 2016 H.J. Hill All Rights Reserved.