I am Stella, Queen of the Olde English Bulldogges. BEDTIME! BEDTIME! EVERYBODY TO BED NOW!
Me: Yeah, everybody. Settle down.
Stella: You, too, Lady Human. It’s your bedtime.
Me: I’ll probably go to bed when this movie is over.
Stella: No, bedtime is now.
Me: No. Bedtime is when I say it is.
Stella: Go ahead and say it is now, because it is now.
Me: I will go to bed when I want to go to bed.
Stella: But I sleep in your room and I want to go to bed.
Me: Then go to bed.
Stella: No, not until you go.
Me: What’s the difference?
Stella: For one thing, you have my nighttime snacks and I don’t want to go to bed without them. You may eat them all while I am not looking.
Me: Well, they do look good…
Stella: Lady Human! Typical! Just typical!
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